Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny. – C.S. Lewis
This quote by Lewis, a British poet and author, suggests that hardships can be difficult in the short-term, but has significant results in the long-term. When someone endures hardship, they have the capacity to bounce back sooner or later. However, how soon an individual returns back to their normal life is determined by how resilient he is.
Resilience is the capacity to recover quickly from hardships. The good part is resilience can be cultivated. It might take time and effort, if one cultivate it, can benefit from it for a lifetime.
Hardship can be failing in an exam, losing a loved one, changing schools or countries, recovering from an illness, and many more. According to research, resilience leads to greater happiness, more success and better health.
Here are some ways to build resilience:
1.Learn from failure: Treat every failure as a stepping stone to success. It took Thomas Edison ten thousand failed attempts to finally get the physics of the light bulb right. Edison once remarked, “I failed my way to success.” According to Teentalkindia Expert “the ability to look at the bigger picture, stay focused and not give up, enables one to look past failures and move on.”
2.Focus on your strengths: Writer Tal Ben-Shahar who teaches positive psychology writes in his book ‘Choose The Life You Want’ that individuals who invest in their strengths are happier and more successful. Some questions to ask yourself are:
- What are my strengths?
- What am I naturally good at?
- Where do my talents reside?
- What are my unique abilities?
3.Self-compassion is key: If your friend failed in an exam, would you call him a failure or offer support? In most cases, you would offer support. Hence, this attitude should be applied to ourselves as well. If we make mistakes or do not meet our expectations, instead of criticizing ourselves, maybe we can learn to be compassionate?
4.Humour: Do not take yourself too seriously. In moments of doubt and sadness, inject humour. Do not feel bad to laugh or smile. As they say, laughter is the best medicine. Watch your favourite TV show or follow the stand-up comedian who cracks you up.
5.Focus on successes: Sometimes, we tend to focus on past failures more as compared to past accomplishments. This creates a distorted view of reality. Pat yourself on the back when you do a small thing right. Remember your achievements and moments when you succeeded.
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