Question : I am very shy. I don’t know how to put myself in front of people or how to interact with them. I am trying but I can’t be comfortable with them. I want to overcome this. Please suggest me something to overcome it. Teentalker
Dear Teentalker,
Thanks for sharing your concern.
These are normal situations that life puts us in. We all have to learn to deal with it. There might be obstacles you might face when put in social situations. One of them is shyness. Some psychologists consider it to be a mild fear. However, being shy is a part of growing up. There is nothing wrong with it. But if being shy is stopping you from talking to others, there might be some steps you can take to overcome them.
1. Do you have low self-esteem? According to research, shyness can be a result of low self-esteem. A stronger form of shyness can be social anxiety or social phobia. But let’s not go that far. One way of successfully overcoming low self-esteem is trying to figure out your strengths. Ask yourself: what activities make you feel most confident?
2. Talk about your strengths – When faced with unfamiliar people and situations, it is best to approach them confidently. But how do you do that when the mere thought of people scare you? It is by remembering your strengths and using them to your advantage. Your strength can be writing or the fact that you are good at cricket or even that you read a lot.
3. Do not worry about what others think about you – One of the primary reasons for shyness is an ego-driven fear of how other peers will perceive you. You might be caught up in a web of what others might think of you. Maybe in the past, you might be subjected to criticism, rejection or humiliation. But remember, all situations do not have to be negative.
4. Say uplifting things to yourself – If you have a party to attend and you feel really uncomfortable, make a list of 3 things you appreciate about yourself. These can be simple stuff such as, “I am a good friend,” or “I crack funny jokes,” among others. Say these positive affirmations to yourself and you will feel better.
5. Being rejected is okay – When we try something new, we are bound to fail, But that does not mean that we are failures. It means that we are willing to try. You might face rejection in the beginning. People might make fun of you and might not talk to you. It is okay. What is not okay is giving up and remaining in your shell. Give it another try!
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