Question : I am a teenager and some of my friends often back bite about others, spread rumours, bully others and talk negatively about everything. I feel irritated and annoyed in their company. How can I distance myself from these people? Teentalker
Dear Teentalker,
Thanks for reaching out and sharing your concerns with us. I can imagine that being around such people can really suck the energy and positivity out of you and distancing yourself from them is a healthy choice.
People who drain the life out of you with negative attitudes, constant complaining, gossip, selfishness, or extreme dependency are damaging you in a way that can cause sadness. However, you need courage to tell a toxic person the truth. Not only is this the only way to disengage from a damaging relationship in your life, but that person needs to hear it from you so that it might encourage them to examine their life. Here are some tips to cope with toxic people.
Stay in close contact with those who make you feel safe, cherished and happy. These are the people who will model healthy friendships and relationships, reminding you exactly why you are choosing to sever toxic ones.
Moving away from toxic relationships requires true acceptance of the fact that you can’t force toxic people to change. Toxic people are not motivated by what’s good for them or for their relationship with you. They’re motivated by their own unresolved problems and needs.
Toxic people create drama deliberately in order to attract more attention and engage in manipulation. But the important thing to know is that these are crises of their own making.
When you’re in a toxic relation, you’ll notice that the other person tends to exploit your flaws and find ways to use them against you. Balance them against your strengths, believe that you are a good person, and commit to self – improvement.
Remove them from your life, be strong and remember that you are doing this for your own good — and for the good of your family. Negativity will eventually manifest itself physically and emotionally, causing a ripple effect that will impact both you and your loved ones.
Remind yourself that you can make new friends and don’t always need them to be around you. You need to focus on yourself. It’s not easy to uproot someone from your life but it isn’t impossible either.
Hope this is helpful for you. If you have additional queries, please connect with us on chat from Monday through Saturday between 11am and 8pm or leave us an offline message.
Regards,
Expert Teentalk India