Question : I am dating a boy for last 3 years and recently I came to know that he likes ‘cross dressing’. Since the, I am feeling frustrated and don’t know what to do? टीनटॉकर
Thanks for reaching out and sharing your issue.
I can really understand what you are going through. It’s natural to feel like this. Cross-dressers are heterosexual men who like to dress up in women’s clothes. They discover their need to cross-dress during childhood by dressing up in their sister’s or mother’s clothes. They soon find that it is not accepted and are told to stop it. They become secretive and try to suppress their feelings and their desire to cross-dress.
Men who hide habits or parts of their personality from their partner often do so out of fear of being judged or losing love or respect. But, here I appreciate he honestly disclosed this part of his personality to you. I would like you to focus on some more points on cross dressing, which might help you in this stage:
1. Although cross-dressing is a sexual fetish for some, the vast majority of men do not experience any arousal. It is simply the exploration of feminine self-expression. Some men find that cross-dressing makes them feel relaxed and helps them with stress.
2. It is essential for a family member or a partner to become informed and educated by reading relevant literature to understand and come to terms with such a challenging situation. Professional counselling is a valid consideration.
3. Cross-dressing should not be mixed up with being transsexual or transgender, i.e. a person who is an individual with a gender identity which is not consistent with his or hers assigned gender.
4. It is common for partners and family to question every aspect of the man’s behaviour after learning about his crossdressing. Those in shock can feel that because they were kept in the dark about it. You might feel that everything is different, but it is important for both of you that you try to resist those feelings for now. He requires your understanding and support and in turn, you need the same.
5.For many, finding out a partner is crossdressing throws up many questions about a future relationship. It is very common to worry that your partner no longer feels the same way about you. Most of the time this is about personal identity and doesn’t actually change the way your partner feels about you. It is possible for couples to work through and understand these feelings together.
It is important that you approach this very carefully. As much as possible, don’t allow your emotions to influence your judgement. It’s likely that the man involved has not spoken to anyone about crossdressing, their privacy should be respected, especially since there is still so much misunderstanding and stigma in society in general.
If you’d find it helpful to talk these issues with an experienced counsellor in complete confidence, please visit a Psychotherapist in your city. Hope this is helpful. If you wish to discuss your situation further, please chat with us from Monday through Saturday between 11am and 8pm or leave us an offline message.
Expert Teentalk India